Thursday, November 11, 2010

Medical Board

The past two weeks have been a little crazy. I have been trying to schedule work and military obligations. I have been working on my medical board and have had to answer difficult questions. Not my idea of a good time but I am glad it is getting done. Unfortunately, the depression and anxiety is through the roof. Driving at night still poses significant issues. It has been super hard to sleep and concentrate. The time commitment and PTSD symptoms have impacted my ability to finish one of my courses. It looks like I may be taking a failure in a course. However, it is teaching me limits and I know I have done my best. The medical board time commitment is making it impossible to attend class and understand class material. One of the other benefits of not finishing the course is that I have more time to make medical appointments. I am able to attend more counseling sessions a week. I also have more time to find a medication that will help my symptoms. Being on medication last week helped me greatly. It was nice not to feel like I had to force myself get active. I was also able to have better focus and concentration. The grocery store was not as overwhelming. I was able to go into the grocery store, buy what I needed, not end up with something I did not need, and still stay relatively calm. Counseling is teaching me to be grateful for the little battles. I am learning to be proud of the these accomplishments. However, I had another reaction to medication and will have to start the process again. The reaction ended quickly and I do not see any long term effects at this time. This is great news. I have rewarded my willingness to take care of myself and do difficult things with trips to PETCO. I have found some great dog toys and beds. There is a dog bed that is a beautiful blue and has lots of room. I could almost sleep on this bed. I see possibilities for the upcoming new member of the family.

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